Stop with the Terrible Virtual Etiquette

This is an excerpt from a new chapter in the 10-Year Anniversary Edition of my best-selling book, How to Be a Wildly Effective Compliance Officer.  

Blue-tinted laptop on a desk with a phone and coffee cup, with the text “Stop with the Terrible Virtual Etiquette” overlaid.

I’ll admit it – I’m fixated on how I show up on camera, and I also care how my team shows up. I assign a video to all new hires lovingly described as “How not to make Kristy crazy.”  

I expect myself and my team to follow all of the rules below. Not because I’m a bit of a control freak (OK, sometimes), but because following these rules creates the best experience for everyone in the meeting with them.  

How you show up remotely can make a massive difference in your effectiveness with the business.  

Let’s dive in.  

Turn On Your (Freaking) Camera 

The number one thing you can do to bolster your image in the company at remote meetings is to turn on your camera. For better or worse, we’ve all become extremely adept at reading facial movements and body language online. When someone has their camera off, we lose a huge amount of information and communication suffers.  

A recent survey of 500 executives found that 92% don’t see a long-term future for employees who turn their cameras off, and 93% perceived off-camera employees to be less engaged in their work.i 

And those bosses are right. Researchers have found that departing employees disabled their cameras nearly twice as often as those remaining employed. An even larger percentage of leavers never unmuted their microphones. In short, once they failed to show up on screen, they ultimately failed to show up at work.ii 

But what if you plan to stay? Turn on that camera. A survey by recruiting company Korn Ferry found that 76% of respondents say they believe those who leave cameras off are looked upon negatively, and 60% say choosing not to be on camera during meetings is a “career minimizing move.”iii 

Yes – camera fatigue is real, and there are lots of surveys and studies that show that it is draining to be on camera and that it creates stress. But that’s a small price to pay to be seen as Wildly Effective. So turn on your freaking camera. Always. 

Watch Your Hands 

A woman and man in business attire enjoy noodles with chopsticks from takeout boxes in an office, sharing a light-hearted, casual lunch moment.

People have all sorts of unconscious habits, and unfortunately, many can be seen onscreen. Pay attention to anything that can be seen on camera.  

I interviewed someone for a job at Spark Compliance who clicked a pen on and off throughout the interview. Within five minutes, I’d decided not to hire them. I knew that behavior would distract clients from what this person was saying.  

I’ve also seen people who regularly twirl their hair. This can make the person seem less serious or experienced, which can affect credibility.  

I’ve seen people habitually slump in their chairs and rest their head on their hands. It makes them look sad and unengaged – or worse – bored and uninterested in the meeting.  

Be conscious of your behavior on camera. You want people to listen to your words, not your distracting body language.  

You’re On Mute 

When you’re not speaking, stay on mute. The background noise can be very distracting for others. And for heaven’s sake – if you need to type, make doubly-sure you’re on mute. The clicking can sidetrack a meeting fast.  

Dress the Part 

A smiling woman in a pink blazer and checkered socks lounges with feet up on a desk, using a tablet. A cup and plant are nearby, creating a relaxed atmosphere.

Show up dressed for work – at least for the part of you that can be seen on camera. Not dressing like a businessperson shows disrespect for everyone else at the meeting who chose to get up and be professional. People who don’t show up looking like they care will never be seen as Wildly Effective.  

Stop the Multi-tasking 

I get it. I’ve been in a million boring, awful, soul-sucking meetings. I don’t want to be there. But multi-tasking isn’t the answer.  

People like to think they are good at multi-tasking but they’re not. Science has shown that multi-tasking doesn’t actually exist. When people try to multi-task, they’re actually task-switching, meaning that their mind is quickly jumping back and forth from one thing to another. 

And it doesn’t work well. According to authority Anne Roberts, “this constant switching takes a toll on cognitive load, the total amount of mental effort used in the working memory. Each shift requires the brain to reorient and refocus, consuming significant cognitive resources. This reduces the quality of work and increases the time required to complete tasks.” 

Have you ever been called on in a meeting while you’re emailing and aren’t sure what you’re being asked about because you haven’t been following closely enough? I have. And it was enough to stop that behavior cold.  

If you’re in a bad meeting, choose to be present emotionally and physically. It’s hard, but better than taxing your brain and creating sub-standard work product.  

The updated edition of How to Be a Wildly Effective Compliance Officer will be out soon!